What Is a Counsellor?
And how to know whether counselling is right for you
Most people don’t arrive at counselling with a neat explanation of what’s going on. They arrive with fragments.
Something feels off. You’re coping, technically — but it’s taking more effort than it should. You’ve explained it to friends, maybe Googled it late at night, maybe wondered whether this is just “life” or something that could actually be helped.
At some point, a practical question shows up: What does a counsellor actually do — and is that what I need?
If you’ve never been to therapy before, it’s common to feel unsure about what you’re walking into. Is this where someone tells you what’s wrong with you? Is this where you find out you have anxiety, ADHD, unresolved childhood issues you hadn’t planned on opening? Do you need the right words, or a clear story, before you even start?
Counselling doesn’t begin with diagnoses, labels, or deep dives into your past. It usually begins much closer to where you already are — with curiosity, clarification, and figuring out what’s actually going on underneath the surface.
What a counsellor actually does
At its core, counselling is about helping people make sense of their internal world and their patterns — emotional, behavioural, and relational — in a way that leads to meaningful change.
Counsellors work with individuals, couples, and families around issues such as stress, anxiety, relationship difficulties, emotional regulation, identity questions, life transitions, grief, and ongoing patterns that feel confusing or stuck. These are not rare or unusual experiences; they’re part of being human, especially in a fast, demanding world.
In a counselling session, you’re not expected to explain yourself perfectly. Many people start by saying some version of, “I don’t really know where to begin,” or “I’m not sure this makes sense.” That’s not a problem — it’s often the work.
Counselling creates space to slow things down enough to notice what usually happens on autopilot: how thoughts, emotions, behaviours, and relationships interact. Over time, that awareness becomes the foundation for learning new ways of responding — ones that feel more aligned, flexible, and sustainable.
Importantly, counselling is not about being told what to do. It’s a collaborative process. The counsellor brings training, structure, and perspective; you bring lived experience. Meaning is built together.
What counselling is — and isn’t — for
Counselling is generally suited to people experiencing mild to moderate psychological or emotional difficulties — the kinds of struggles that affect quality of life, relationships, and wellbeing, but don’t necessarily require medical or psychiatric intervention.
That includes things like:
Ongoing stress or anxiety
Emotional overwhelm or shutdown
Relationship and communication difficulties
Life transitions and identity questions
Grief, loss, or adjustment
Repeating patterns you don’t fully understand yet
What counselling does not do is diagnose mental disorders or prescribe medication. That doesn’t mean your experience isn’t serious or valid — it simply means different professionals have different roles.
A good counsellor understands their scope. When something sits outside it — for example, when diagnostic assessment, medication, or specialised psychiatric care would be helpful — ethical practice involves discussing that openly and supporting appropriate referral.
Counselling works best when it’s part of a clear, well-boundaried system of care, not when one person tries to do everything.
Training, experience, and credibility (without the jargon)
In Australia, counsellors typically complete formal education in counselling or psychotherapy at a bachelor or postgraduate level. This training includes theory, ethics, skills development, and supervised practice.
However, credibility isn’t just about holding a qualification.
It’s best understood as a combination of:
Recognised education
Ongoing professional development
Clinical supervision
Ethical accountability
Professional bodies play an important role here. Organisations such as the Australian Counselling Association (ACA) and the Psychotherapy and Counselling Federation of Australia (PACFA) set minimum training standards, outline ethical obligations, and provide complaints processes. Membership doesn’t guarantee a perfect fit — but it does provide a baseline of accountability.
Experience matters, but it doesn’t replace training. A credible counsellor is transparent about both.
How counsellors tend to work
Counsellors draw from a range of evidence-informed therapeutic orientations. You don’t need to know the names of these approaches to benefit from them — and you’re not expected to choose one.
That said, having some understanding of how a counsellor works can go a long way in helping you decide whether someone feels like the right fit.
Different approaches emphasise different things, such as insight, skills, emotional processing, behaviour change, or relational patterns. None of these are inherently better than the others, but they can feel very different in practice.
Broadly, counselling may include elements of:
Person-centred and humanistic work
Cognitive and behavioural approaches
Acceptance-based and “third wave” therapies
Narrative or solution-focused perspectives
Relational and systemic thinking
Some counsellors work in a more structured, goal-oriented way. Others are more exploratory and reflective. Most move between the two, depending on what’s useful at the time.
Counselling can be short-term and focused, or it can unfold over a longer period as patterns become clearer. Depth is guided by readiness, safety, and context — not by pressure to “go deep” for its own sake.
If you are unsure what a counsellor’s approach means, you can invite your counsellor to explain how they typically work and what sessions might involve. A good counsellor will be able to describe their approach in plain language and help you decide whether it feels like a good fit for you.
What counselling sessions usually look like
Early sessions are typically about orientation rather than resolution. You might spend time clarifying what has brought you in, naming patterns, and developing a shared understanding of what you are working toward.
The early sessions — often the first two or three are about building a shared understanding. This phase can feel slower than people expect. You might leave thinking, “We didn’t really fix anything yet.” That’s normal. Foundation work matters.
Counselling sessions usually run for a set length of time, often around fifty minutes, and occur weekly, fortnightly, or at another agreed rhythm. Session length and frequency can absolutely support movement and momentum, but more is not always better.
Therapy is not just about getting everything out as quickly as possible. The time between sessions, when your nervous system and mind have space to settle and integrate, is often just as important as what happens in the room.
As therapy continues, sessions may involve developing skills, reflecting on patterns, experimenting with new ways of responding, and making sense of emotional experiences as they arise. Change often shows up subtly at first in awareness, choice, or flexibility — before it becomes obvious externally.
If sessions move too fast, or heavy material is opened without enough time to settle, therapy can start to feel unsettling rather than supportive. Being challenged at times is part of the process, but consistently leaving sessions feeling overwhelmed or unclear is worth talking about.
Often, the solution is not changing the focus of the work, but adjusting the pacing. This can be as simple as your counsellor paying closer attention to time when difficult material is explored, or intentionally using the final minutes of a session for reflection, grounding, breathing, or brief affirmations so you leave feeling contained rather than exposed.
These conversations are part of the work, not a disruption to it. A good counsellor will welcome them and adjust collaboratively, so therapy remains something you can engage with, not something you have to recover from.
Who counselling tends to suit — and who it may not
Counselling may be a good fit if you:
Want a collaborative, conversational approach
Are seeking psychological support without medication
Are open to reflection and gradual change
Are experiencing mild to moderate difficulties
It may not be the best fit if you:
Need diagnostic assessment
Require medication management
Are in acute psychiatric crisis
This isn’t about better or worse — it’s about fit. Choosing the right professional is less about hierarchy and more about alignment.
How to find a credible counsellor
Start with transparency. Look for counsellors who clearly outline their training, approach, and scope of practice.
Professional directories such as those run by ACA, PACFA and/or Psychology Today are a good place to begin. Referrals from GPs or allied health professionals can also be helpful.
When speaking with a counsellor, it’s reasonable to ask:
What kinds of issues do you most commonly work with?
What does therapy with you usually look like?
What happens if I feel stuck or unsure about the process?
How do you usually structure sessions, especially early on??
What is your scheduling, availability and flexibility?
You’re allowed to take your time choosing. A good counsellor will support that process — not rush it.